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Play and your child

Wednesday, February 17th, 2010

At The Goddard School, first time parents sometimes ask about the best way to bond and interact with their child.  Here are some insights from Dr. Pruett, MD.

Find ways to involve your children in the richness of your ‘grown-up’ life.  Be creative and patient because the results are worth your effort!
best preschool
For young children, play is a lot more than entertainment. It is central to their development.  A wonderful way to play with and teach children is to bring them into your world, where ‘real-life’ happens.  Children love to do ‘grown-up’ things and to imitate you.  And when they contribute, they see themselves as players and get a well-earned self-esteem boost!

Children also learn about important values and concepts from watching you.  They see the result of practice and perseverance, and they come to know that learning is a lifelong process. They see that everyone, even a grown-up, can make mistakes and can learn from them.

There are two easy and enjoyable ways for your children to play in the grown-up world: you can let them help with your chores and you can include them in your favorite pastimes.

Work as play:  Include your children in your household routine.  There are countless safe ways for children to help with meals, laundry, shopping or cleaning.  They can help mix recipe ingredients, pick fruit at the grocery store, water the garden or pack their lunch.  These activities are fun learning experiences, especially if you are teaching informally along the way.  The chores may take a little longer as they learn the ropes, make mistakes, and work at a snail’s pace, but the value for their learning and their self-regard are more than worth the extra time.

Hobbies and pastimes:  Share your interests with your children.  This is one of the most intriguing, emotionally rich forms of learning that children can receive.  Teach your children about your avocations, and keep up with your piano, chess, painting, hiking or gardening.   Your enthusiasm for your hobbies will be infectious and offer many ways for your children to learn and develop skills.

Kyle D. Pruett, M.D., is an advisor for The Goddard School®.  Dr. Pruett is an authority on child development who has been practicing child and family psychiatry for over twenty-five years.  He is a clinical professor of child psychiatry at Yale University’s Child Study Center.

Visit our website @ http://www.goddardschool.com//Schools/Cedar-Park-TX/Schools.gspx.  You  can find out what we’re doing that’s educational and fun each month with the Goddard School monthly events SUBSCRIBE HERE

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Children and biting

Monday, February 15th, 2010

At The Goddard School, our parents of toddlers often ask about the issue of biting. Here are some suggestions by Kyle D. Pruett, M.D.

Why does a nearly universal event in a child’s development evoke such strong feelings? Odds are – as children we were either a biter or a victim – and often both. Plus, biting hurts and frightens us a lot. And though we know aggression is a normal part of development, regular cruelty is not, and we fear the connection between the two.

Dr. Kyle D. Pruett, M.
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Some thoughts to help us manage:

  • When children first bite, it is often their mother while breast-feeding, and their motive is most probably curiosity – not aggression. Mothers should send the following message to their infant: “Ouch, no and if you bite, you lose the breast – end of discussion.”
  • Biting often begins as exploration, but may be quickly associated with out-of-control feelings or feelings of being overwhelmed – with excitement, fear or curiosity. Parents should manage these feelings by staying as calm as possible and firmly saying:

o “No one likes biting, especially me.”
o “You just cannot bite.”
o “I’ll help you stop until you stop yourself.”

  • Parents often fear biting at school most. Peers, especially close ones, are fascinated by each other’s aggression, and the dramatic reactions it evokes. Adult overreaction just makes things more exciting! Experienced teachers have radar for when ‘the chompies’ are in the air and become particularly vigilant.
  • If all adults involved in a biting incident are convinced that it was not an isolated but willful, premeditated event, both children should be kept safe.  Adults should explore the language of what went on and be able to offer alternative responses.

Finally, it bears stating – parents should never bite children back. Believe me, I understand the impulse, but all you accomplish is establishing mutual violence as an acceptable value in your family, embarrassing yourself, and degrading the natural authority you have with your children.  They want your help with this stuff, not your indulgence.

Kyle D. Pruett, M.D. is an advisor for The Goddard School®.  Dr. Pruett is an authority on child development who has been practicing child and family psychiatry for over twenty-five years.  He is a clinical professor of child psychiatry at Yale University’s Child Study Center.

Visit our website @ http://www.goddardschool.com//Schools/Cedar-Park-TX/Schools.gspx & find out what we’re doing that’s educational and fun each month with the Goddard School monthly events SUBSCRIBE HERE

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Siblings

Sunday, January 24th, 2010

So your expecting your second child?  Congratulations!  At The Goddard School of Cedar Park, parents often wrestle with how to make it a smooth transition for the oldest child.  Here are some great suggestions by Kyle D. Pruett, M.D in a guest article:

Nothing unsettles the lives of children quite like the birth of a sibling: special event for parents = profound disruption of familial bliss for children.  Some children take it in stride, but the majority may not. Having a sibling forces children to share the wealth in an important and healthy adaptation to living in the real world.  Here are a few ideas about how to ease the pain, and promote the joy:

  • ‘Me, myself and I’ – The mantra of toddler-hood reminds us that 18 to 24 months finds most kids falling short of being able to participate in the care of a younger sibling. They have just begun to take care of their own business, so looking after someone else’s (with whom you have to share mom and dad) is annoying to say the least.
  • By 48 months:  Children are able to feel some ownership of a new baby – rocking, diapering, comforting, and playing with a baby are possible, if not always high on their list of fun things to do.  They own enough familial territory by now that they can afford to share.
  • A younger sibling often adores an older sibling.  Teach your older one (don’t ignore the boys) to be tender and gentle when holding or feeding the baby.  This is great training for future intimacy and competent parenting.
  • Preserve time alone with your older children several times a week. They may no longer be the ‘only,’ but they are the still the ‘first,’ and certain privileges pertain, along with new responsibilities!
Dr. Kyle D. Pruett, M.
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Don’t underestimate how your own experience as a sibling -in a particular birth order – affects your perception of your children’s experience. You may be off by a mile in your evaluation of your child’s jealousy of a new baby if you are the baby in your own family, or the first-born.

Keep the dialogue open with your children about the shape of their sibling relationships and you will learn a lot.

Kyle D. Pruett, M.D. is an advisor for The Goddard School®.  Dr. Pruett is an authority on child development who has been practicing child and family psychiatry for over twenty-five years.  He is a clinical professor of child psychiatry at Yale University’s Child Study Center.

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Mom and Dad are Different

Sunday, January 17th, 2010

At The Goddard School, the subject of parenting differences comes up on numerous occasions.  Read the following for some great insight on this topic!

by Kyle D. Pruett, M.D.
Mothers and fathers care for their children in very unique ways.  Children can recognize the differences between mother and father care, which actually enhances their development.  This article focuses on the critical role fathers play in a child’s development.

Newborns can differentiate between mom’s voice and touch and dad’s voice and touch.  Although mom may have gotten a head start on the bonding process with the baby, dads have their chance, too.  By six weeks old an infant can distinguish a father’s voice from a mother’s, and while a quiet baby may pay more attention to mom’s voice, an upset baby will calm more readily to his father’s handling.  Mothers usually are very consistent in the way that they handle their children, often picking them up in the same manner, saying the same thing before they handle them, for example, at bath or bedtime.  Dads rarely approach the baby with such consistency.  Each time they pick up the baby, they usually do so in a different manner than before, but this helps the baby recognize that it is dad who is holding him.

Parents with child Statue, Hrobákova street, P...

Time with dad is typically less structured and more play-oriented than with mom.  Most of mother’s time with her children is dedicated to care-giving tasks or educational play, while dad’s time is less structured and full of impromptu play.  Where mom uses toys, dad tends to use his body.  Dads are typically more physical with the kids and they love it.  Physical play helps to stimulate both physical and brain development.  Dads also have a tendency to make any situation educational, even if they don’t realize it themselves, so that a father’s tasks around the house might be an adventure for the child.

Fathers challenge their children to learn.  Obviously, both mom and dad want to help their child learn in any way they can, but they do this differently also.  For example, when teaching a frustrated child, a mother tends to assist her in finding the answer; whereas, a father is more likely to guide the child through the frustration and challenge her longer to find the answer on her own.  Fathers also encourage more exploration and boundary pushing than moms do.  A father’s way of teaching his child persistence in the face of adversity results in positive academic and social performance in the long run.  Certainly, one style is not better than the other, and children absolutely benefit from both.

THE ROLE OF FATHERS
Recent research about the role of fathers and their approach to parenting include the following:

  • Fathers tend stylistically to encourage problem-solving skills by letting their kids struggle with frustration a little longer before stepping in to help.  (Of course, there is a huge personal variation here, as there is in mothers.)
  • Fathers permit a little more emotional autonomy during learning sequences with their young children, supporting and encouraging but without the same emphasis on intimacy that is more typical among mothers.
  • Fathers tend to mix play with learning a little more successfully, from the child’s point of view, allowing longer work periods.
  • Fathers’ more functional (‘do it because it needs to be done,’ rather than ‘do it because it will go better between us if you do’) approach to academic work builds in the child a larger range of problem-solving skills over time that probably contributes to more lasting self-esteem.

Kyle D. Pruett, M.D., is an advisor for The Goddard School®.  Dr. Pruett is an authority on child development who has been practicing child and family psychiatry for over twenty-five years.  He is a clinical professor of child psychiatry at Yale University’s Child Study Center.

Visit our website @ http://www.goddardschool.com//Schools/Cedar-Park-TX/Schools.gspx &  follow us on Twitter @  http://twitter.com/GoddardSchoolCP

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Toddler Biting Behavior

Wednesday, January 13th, 2010

Continuing from my last post on toddler biting behavior, if it happens again, or if your child bites someone for reasons other than first time curiosity, behavior modification may be needed.

Sometime as parents, we tend to panic and draw a blank, when our child does something unexpected. Especially, if it is something that hurts another person. Keep these things in mind if your toddler displays biting behavior:

A few side tips:
-Don’t ever laugh if your child playfully bites. This will reinforce their behavior.
-Don’t bite them back. This will also reinforce their behavior or cause confusion for them.
-When you play with your toddler, eliminate the use of playful and fake biting. This is another thing that reinforces their biting behavior and causes confusion.
-Pack plenty of snacks when your toddler is out and about. Sometimes they might be trying to satisfy an urge of hunger.

If your toddlers biting behavior is occurring while you are not present, you may want to talk to your childcare provider about taking some ideas and implementing some of these tips.

Visit our website @ http://www.goddardschool.com//Schools/Cedar-Park-TX/Schools.gspx & follow us on Twitter @ http://twitter.com/GoddardSchoolCP

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Child Sleep Issues

Saturday, January 9th, 2010

At the Goddard School, parents will express concerns about their child’s sleeping habits and patterns.  The following article by Kyle Pruett, M.D., provides excellent insight on this topic.
Children’s sleep issues are among the more challenging developmental stages for parents to master.  But biology is on the parents’ side in this one, because sleep patterns mature over time just like other developmental skills.

  • Polls tell us that one-third of American children and their parents sleep together some or most of the time before children start school. Co-sleeping varies hugely by culture and ethnicity. So think about what you want to do, and discuss the pros and cons with your pediatrician.
  • Make sure your crib is safe (locking rails), that your older child’s ‘big bed’ has side rails, and if you are co-sleeping, that there is plenty of room.
  • The human brain is active during sleep, but the deepest sleep is typically at the beginning of the night.  Babies spend more time than older children in stimulating REM sleep, with eye movements and irregular breathing. Don’t worry about all that action in your child’s body – it too is growth.
  • Start them young – do not ignore the importance of naps, watch for the yawn, and start bedtime early in the evening.
  • The transition from crib to bed is also a time of sleep pattern changes, but most kids want it to work.
  • To instill good sleep habits remember that consistency matters so much:

o Bath Time
o Goodnights
o Tuck and Talk Bedtime Story
o Lullabye (yours are best)
o Goodnights
Goddard School
This all sounds well and good, but it is a rare family that hasn’t had to handle some sleep trouble along the way.  If your family is trying to re-establish a lapsed routine, stay calm and reassuring.  We almost all need more sleep than we get, and it is a tremendous gift to our children to teach them how to sleep well.

Suggested Resource: American Academy of Pediatrics http://www.aap.org
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Kyle D. Pruett, M.D. is an advisor for The Goddard School®.  Dr. Pruett is an authority on child development who has been practicing child and family psychiatry for over twenty-five years.  He is a clinical professor of child psychiatry at Yale University’s Child Study Center.

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Is Your Child a Picky Eater?

Saturday, December 26th, 2009

At The Goddard School of Cedar Park, parents have a choice of providing a packed lunch or using a hot catered lunch service.  Having the flexibility of packing your child’s lunch for preschool is important for the reasons noted below.  While we all understand the importance of good nutrition during early childhood, a few of us are blessed with extraordinarily picky eaters. What’s a parent to do?

goddard_nutrition_infant_toddler

Children who attend preschool are better served when their parents pack their lunches. Why?  Because the process of choosing, packing and providing healthy meal choices is in the hands of parents; not a caterer or packaged meal plan provider. This is especially important if your child is a picky eater.

The Strategy:

  • Let your child be a part of a healthy food conversation.  Discuss the week’s menus and the specific ingredients.  Read cookbooks and magazines – or just look at the interesting pictures.
  • Engage your child while at the food store and give them choices. For example, “Let’s pick a fruit to pack in your lunches.  Would you like to bring strawberries or apples?”
  • Add a little sous chef to your dinner preparations. Ask your children to bring two lemons to you or put them in charge of stirring cold items. This may delay dinner, but consider the reward – quality time!
  • It is normal for toddlers and young children to be picky eaters. They may refuse food based on its texture or color – do not fret, keep trying!

Parent Tips:

  • Offer new foods on multiple occasions. Many children need to try a new food up to a dozen times before they like it.
  • Set a good example and try new foods yourself.
  • Encourage healthy food portions. Never insist that children “clean their plates.” Rewarding a clean plate may lead to a distorted idea of food, such as ignoring feeling full or eating for a reward.
  • Make healthy snacks available. Make fruits or veggies convenient to your child.
  • Encourage your children to serve and feed themselves. Independence boosts self-esteem which leads to better food choices.
    Make ‘dining out’ a special occasion – even if it’s at the local burger joint. Children can practice manners and food choices in any dining experience.
    Reward children with praise, hugs and kisses. Resist rewarding children’s good behavior with sugary treats.

Visit our website @ http://www.goddardschool.com//Schools/Cedar-Park-TX/Schools.gspx & follow us on Twitter @ http://twitter.com/GoddardSchoolCP

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Foreign Language at Goddard School

Friday, December 18th, 2009

At The Goddard School of Cedar Park, English is not necessarily the primary language for a child! Here are some suggestions on second language development for young children.
To start out with you begin easily when they are born speaking and singing to them in both English and the second or even third language of our choice. As you continue to do this you will notice your infant paying close attention to both languages and soon it will become very natural for them to hear this.

As the baby continues to grow you can start to associate words with actions or items. For example, if you are playing with a stuffed dog you can say the word in English as well as Spanish and do it repeatedly. You can do with just about anything you do with your baby and toddler. As you feed them you can tell them what they are eating and say the words “spoon” or “fork” in the foreign language as well.

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Exposing an infant or young child to a learning environment, such as The Goddard School, that makes learning languages fun and exciting without being rigid like other learning methods can also be beneficial. Besides becoming accustomed to the new language they are also getting social interaction with other babies and children their age.

There are so many advantages that come with your infant and toddler learning a second language! It is very important to give them the chance to learn early in life – this will make it easier when they begin more formal language classes in school and expose them to the richness of other cultures in the world around us.

Visit our website @ http://www.goddardschool.com//Schools/Cedar-Park-TX/Schools.gspx & follow us on Twitter @ http://twitter.com/GoddardSchoolCP

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Toddlers and Infants Reap Benefits with Learning Second Languages

Wednesday, December 16th, 2009

At The Goddard School of Cedar Park, it’s not unusual to hear languages other than English spoken by our children. Like most parents when we first have our children and they are small infants and toddlers we often get caught up in all the emotions of seeing their adorable faces and marveling over the little things they do like clapping their hands together for the first time or taking those first steps. However we often forget that their little minds are like sponges and how beneficial it is for them to learn more advanced things such as second languages. Some homes are naturally bilingual but for other homes they often leave learning second languages up to the school or something for the instructors or teachers to do. Let’s take a look at all the advantages that come with teaching infants and toddlers second languages at home while they are still little.

A picture of a young child
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Studies have been going on for many years that show how beneficial teaching a new language to babies and young children can be. From the second they are born up until they are five years old children are able to absorb new materials very easily. This short window of opportunity is often overlooked. Instead of focusing on the simple things your child is likely to learn on their own one should consider trying to teach them a second language. It is not very difficult to do and there are many small steps you can take to get a head start.

You can begin teaching second languages when they are just small infants. Babies can understand a great deal even before they are able to communicate. Just as a baby first learns to speak and say the basic words like “Ma-Ma” and “Da-Da” they are also able to learn words of other languages just as easily. As their brain develops they are able to track certain sounds, contours and rhythms of words and languages.

I’ll continue with some more ideas on second languages in my next blog. Visit our website @ http://www.goddardschool.com//Schools/Cedar-Park-TX/Schools.gspx & follow us on Twitter @ http://twitter.com/GoddardSchoolCP

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Potty Training Tips

Sunday, December 13th, 2009

At The Goddard School of Cedar Park, potty training is a frequent topic that comes up with parents. So Are you ready to throw out the diapers for good? Common signs that a child is ready to start using the potty are showing interest in the bathroom, letting you know when it’s time for a diaper change, and making funny facial expressions when he goes in his diaper. Another sign that he’s ready is waking up from a nap with a dry diaper. This shows that he is making a subconscious decision not to wet himself. If your child is showing any of these signs, it may be time to start potty training. Potty training can be a rocky road, but here are some potty training tips to make the ride go smoothly.

Just like Daddy...
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Transitioning from diapers to the potty chair can be a scary time for a toddler. Anything new has the tendency to frighten toddlers, so you should do your best to ensure your child that this is not a bad thing. Make it fun. One of the best potty training tips is to present the potty chair like it’s a special gift just for him. Wrap it up in pretty paper, with a big colorful bow, and let your child open it like a present. You’d be amazed at how excited a toddler can get over a potty chair. This will make his introduction to the potty a happy experience, instead of a frightening one.

Another great potty training tip is to make it a point to sit your child on the potty several times a day, even if you’re not sure he needs to go. Toddlers don’t yet know their bodies well enough to decide whether they need to use the potty, so you will have to take some control over this until your child is able to recognize when he needs to go. If you need to, set a timer to go off every ten or fifteen minutes.

I know you’ve heard it a thousand times over, but you can never go wrong with lots, and lots of praise. Kids love to get special attention from their parents. Before he’s even gotten the hang of it, tell your child he did a great job just for trying. The first time he actually goes in the potty make a huge deal out of it. Clap your hands, and excitedly say “hooray! You went pee pee in the potty like a big kid!” You can even make up your own potty song. There are some hilarious potty songs on the web. Just search youtube for potty training tips, and potty songs.

The reward system is tried and true. Using special prizes is the easiest, and most obvious way to motivate your child to use the potty. You can use stickers, candy, or even something unique that he shows an interest in. If your child loves cars, go to the dollar store and buy a variety package of matchbox cars. Just use what you know about your toddler to make him want to use the potty.

The most valuable potty training tip I can give you is to stay consistent. Don’t get discouraged. If you’re on the go a lot, you may want to purchase an extra potty chair to keep in your car. Remember, toddlers are creatures of habit, and keeping up with a routine is very important to them.

Visit our website @ http://www.goddardschool.com//Schools/Cedar-Park-TX/Schools.gspx & follow us on Twitter @ http://twitter.com/GoddardSchoolCP

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